I am continually shocked by the people who lower their bar consistently and predictably. They lower their expectations for themselves, and thus the expectations others have for them. I am sure that the psychology behind it is about not disappointing themselves or others, or maybe just because they feel entitled to put forth the least amount of effort possible while using up valuable resources on this earth.
I am pretty convinced it backfires and there is a profound loss of personal respect on all ends. I have a hard time imagining a day where I wake up and say "Gee, how little can I do today and get away with it?" Absolutely blows my mind...those people exist, and to them I say...I am getting a little tired of tripping over your bar!
I have made it a personal habit of mine to surround myself with people who are smarter than me, more successful than I am, and are continually raising their own bar. I motivates me to become better and raise my own bar. My motto for years has been this:
Wake up tomorrow better than you were today.
Yes, it requires focus, determination, and good old fashioned hard work! Basic physics lesson...raising something makes you stronger. Training to jump over it makes you more powerful and confident that great things are possible.
Lowering something hurts your back, makes you stoop over, and whine and complain about how heavy the bar is. Some people just don't ever pick up a bar, which causes someone else to have to do it. Then they complain again because they have no control or power.
I think you have choices in this life. Raise your bar, accept the possibility of failure and redirection, or keep lowering your bar and let others trip over it. Any time, you can decide to raise that bar. A little at a time, one day at a time, maybe even an inch at a time. I guarantee if you keep at it. Your respect for yourself will grow, and others will begin to respect you too!
Answer the question: I want to be a better ____________. Then set tangible and obtainable goals and maintain your focus!
Oh, and don't forget to ask for help! Lots of bar raisers love to help others do the same!
Raise it and praise it!
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
Kids today...
Anyone who knows me knows that I think kids are cool...
They are fresh and funny and smart, innocent and innovative, they know no limits...
The kids I know have attitude, for a reason. They have the world by the tail, knowledge at their finger tips, and information that creates passion... and a desire to fix the problems instead of create them.
They aren't always the most motivated people, but they sure are taking the world a lot more seriously than we did. Yeah, there are the kids whose parents aren't present, and they are bouncing off of each other, creating drama and chaos...just like we did...
But there are those who have been given the green light to be who they are, find what makes them tick, and KNOW that they were put here for a reason. We have our first ever generation of kids who grew up in:
Health club daycare: where parents took time out of their day to take care of themselves and the kids played together in a safe positive environment. What a great example!
Mandatory preschool: you learned how to share, play nice, and use glue responsibly BEFORE you got to kindergarten.
The internet generation a global perspective from the get go...wow!
A divorce situation: You may say it's a bad thing...I have 3 kids who are more aware of what love is and is not, because of it! They know what real strength looks like and it will be really interesting to see divorce rates start to drop as these kids make life decisions, I guarantee it.
A world where middle class is disappearing and materialism has had its last day People are starving, and bling is OUT! Reaching out is cool and fun.
Non Denominational Church King James, who? Real biblical principles, taught by people who made mistakes and were granted a NEW LIFE in order to teach others how NOT to make the same mistakes.
Take it from one of 'em...
Our kids are our HOPE...remind them daily... and love them, because they are unique individuals, separate from us, created to clean up our mess!
A freaking Men.
They are fresh and funny and smart, innocent and innovative, they know no limits...
The kids I know have attitude, for a reason. They have the world by the tail, knowledge at their finger tips, and information that creates passion... and a desire to fix the problems instead of create them.
They aren't always the most motivated people, but they sure are taking the world a lot more seriously than we did. Yeah, there are the kids whose parents aren't present, and they are bouncing off of each other, creating drama and chaos...just like we did...
But there are those who have been given the green light to be who they are, find what makes them tick, and KNOW that they were put here for a reason. We have our first ever generation of kids who grew up in:
Health club daycare: where parents took time out of their day to take care of themselves and the kids played together in a safe positive environment. What a great example!
Mandatory preschool: you learned how to share, play nice, and use glue responsibly BEFORE you got to kindergarten.
The internet generation a global perspective from the get go...wow!
A divorce situation: You may say it's a bad thing...I have 3 kids who are more aware of what love is and is not, because of it! They know what real strength looks like and it will be really interesting to see divorce rates start to drop as these kids make life decisions, I guarantee it.
A world where middle class is disappearing and materialism has had its last day People are starving, and bling is OUT! Reaching out is cool and fun.
Non Denominational Church King James, who? Real biblical principles, taught by people who made mistakes and were granted a NEW LIFE in order to teach others how NOT to make the same mistakes.
Take it from one of 'em...
Our kids are our HOPE...remind them daily... and love them, because they are unique individuals, separate from us, created to clean up our mess!
A freaking Men.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Consider yourself lucky!
Lucky you woke up this morning.
Lucky there are people and a God who loves you.
Lucky there is a roof over your head.
Lucky planes fly, cars run, internet keeps us connected.
Lucky it is them and not you.
Lucky there is another day to make a difference!
Thank you, God, because today....
I woke up knowing someone misses me.
I have more food that I can eat which means I get to share.
I have another opportunity to serve You!
I am lucky and so are you!
Lucky there are people and a God who loves you.
Lucky there is a roof over your head.
Lucky planes fly, cars run, internet keeps us connected.
Lucky it is them and not you.
Lucky there is another day to make a difference!
Thank you, God, because today....
I woke up knowing someone misses me.
I have more food that I can eat which means I get to share.
I have another opportunity to serve You!
I am lucky and so are you!
Friday, July 23, 2010
Body language
As you set about your day, take time to set your shoulder back, lift your rib cage, raise your chin and take plenty of big deep breaths.
By opening up your chest, and looking up at the world around you, you invite people in. A genuine smile directed at even random strangers can change your own mood.
Ask yourself what image you are presenting to the world today through your body language. Closed off and distracted, or open and loving? Even small children can sense it.
Bring good things to you today!
By opening up your chest, and looking up at the world around you, you invite people in. A genuine smile directed at even random strangers can change your own mood.
Ask yourself what image you are presenting to the world today through your body language. Closed off and distracted, or open and loving? Even small children can sense it.
Bring good things to you today!
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
The little things!
Notice the small stuff today! The good stuff!
The way the house smells after you cook.
The silly things your kids do.
A flower poking out from somewhere it doesn't belong.
The hot shower you spend a little extra time in.
The soft fur of a pet who adores you.
A compliment someone paid you out of nowhere.
The smile of a random stranger.
These are the signs that God is with us. We can hear Him, taste Him, touch Him, smell Him, hear Him...
He isn't in the fancy items you paid too much for or the job you are hanging on to. He is right here, right now, and He loves YOU!
The way the house smells after you cook.
The silly things your kids do.
A flower poking out from somewhere it doesn't belong.
The hot shower you spend a little extra time in.
The soft fur of a pet who adores you.
A compliment someone paid you out of nowhere.
The smile of a random stranger.
These are the signs that God is with us. We can hear Him, taste Him, touch Him, smell Him, hear Him...
He isn't in the fancy items you paid too much for or the job you are hanging on to. He is right here, right now, and He loves YOU!
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Be who you are!
Today as you go about your business, check to see how much effort you are putting in to what people think of you!
If it seems like a lot of effort, something is wrong. If you like you, others will too...effortlessly. If they don't, it is usually a reflection of how they feel about themselves.
Just go ahead and be authentic, reach out and care for others, regardless of whether it is returned. Cultivate your good points and share them with those around you.
Life is just easier that way!
Have a great day!
If it seems like a lot of effort, something is wrong. If you like you, others will too...effortlessly. If they don't, it is usually a reflection of how they feel about themselves.
Just go ahead and be authentic, reach out and care for others, regardless of whether it is returned. Cultivate your good points and share them with those around you.
Life is just easier that way!
Have a great day!
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Make your list and check it often!
Regardless of circumstances that surround you and the trouble that may befall you, it is your choice to be happy. I think sometimes we feel guilty if we are happy when others are in pain so we wallow along with them. In my opinion, that isn't helping either one of you. I am not talking about the obnoxious goof around and hide your pain happy, there is a different kind.
A quiet happy. An inner strength that people see, but they can't exactly put their finger on it. You don't complain, you aren't bitter, you aren't seeking compliments, pity, or pain relief through addictive mediums...Happy people can listen without judgement, offer help without expectation of payment, see a big picture where the world and people are essentially good.
One of the easiest ways to become one of these people is to begin with a grateful heart. No one's life is perfect, even if it looks that way from the outside, but we all have things to be grateful for! I just got through a really tough week, I was sick and needed to go to a doctor, I didn't have health insurance and I was feeling miserable. Add to that a sick child and a lot of missed work. I found myself starting to feel sorry for myself and I caught it almost immediately! So I made a list in my head of the top 10 things I was grateful for. It was surprisingly easy, and didn't take very long at all!
Suggestion for the day: Make a top 10 list of what you are grateful for! It's nothing you need to share with anyone but God, so go ahead and write it down. It can be big things like your children and spouse or little things like a hot shower daily or your favorite exercise class! Look at it before you go to bed at night. Look at it when you wake up in the morning. Take it to work with you. Keep it in the car to read in traffic. Have it available in the places that stress you out the most. Change it as you evolve and as often as necessary. Try it.
God wants you to be happy, He really does!
Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good! His faithful love endures forever. Psalm 107:1
A quiet happy. An inner strength that people see, but they can't exactly put their finger on it. You don't complain, you aren't bitter, you aren't seeking compliments, pity, or pain relief through addictive mediums...Happy people can listen without judgement, offer help without expectation of payment, see a big picture where the world and people are essentially good.
One of the easiest ways to become one of these people is to begin with a grateful heart. No one's life is perfect, even if it looks that way from the outside, but we all have things to be grateful for! I just got through a really tough week, I was sick and needed to go to a doctor, I didn't have health insurance and I was feeling miserable. Add to that a sick child and a lot of missed work. I found myself starting to feel sorry for myself and I caught it almost immediately! So I made a list in my head of the top 10 things I was grateful for. It was surprisingly easy, and didn't take very long at all!
Suggestion for the day: Make a top 10 list of what you are grateful for! It's nothing you need to share with anyone but God, so go ahead and write it down. It can be big things like your children and spouse or little things like a hot shower daily or your favorite exercise class! Look at it before you go to bed at night. Look at it when you wake up in the morning. Take it to work with you. Keep it in the car to read in traffic. Have it available in the places that stress you out the most. Change it as you evolve and as often as necessary. Try it.
God wants you to be happy, He really does!
Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good! His faithful love endures forever. Psalm 107:1
Saturday, July 17, 2010
New blog!
Welcome to the good stuff! Each blog will hopefully bring you some kind of focus, inspiration, or thought that gives you the warm fuzzy and most importantly, you can pass forward on to others! I think we spend too much time thinking about all the stuff we can't control and it is eating us alive, literally.
As many of you know, my writing has come to the very front of who I am as a person. I was always a writer, from a very young age (thanks DAD!) but I didn't always write. Now I do, because God told me too. I just ended a big, sad chapter in my life. I asked God "what is next?" and He said loud and clear, "start talking about the good stuff!" Ok, folks here I go...have fun with this, and don't forget to chime in with things you have seen throughout the day that made you stop and say "Wow, that was good!" It's out there, you just have to stop looking at all the bad stuff first! Try it!
Thought for the day:
If you stand and face the light, the shadows are behind you and you can't see them.
Sometimes the light is so bright, you need to keep your eyes shielded from it, that's ok, just keep moving forward toward it, one step at a time. If you look back, you will see all the shadows, and all of the ugly people who lurk in them. It's easy to stay turned in that direction, it is familiar and comfortable, but it is unproductive and it is NOT God's will for you! Turn back around and look, toward the light. Let the lurkers lurk, let the shadows fall where they may, you have business to attend to and it isn't back in those nasty shadows...it's right in front of you!!!
As many of you know, my writing has come to the very front of who I am as a person. I was always a writer, from a very young age (thanks DAD!) but I didn't always write. Now I do, because God told me too. I just ended a big, sad chapter in my life. I asked God "what is next?" and He said loud and clear, "start talking about the good stuff!" Ok, folks here I go...have fun with this, and don't forget to chime in with things you have seen throughout the day that made you stop and say "Wow, that was good!" It's out there, you just have to stop looking at all the bad stuff first! Try it!
Thought for the day:
If you stand and face the light, the shadows are behind you and you can't see them.
Sometimes the light is so bright, you need to keep your eyes shielded from it, that's ok, just keep moving forward toward it, one step at a time. If you look back, you will see all the shadows, and all of the ugly people who lurk in them. It's easy to stay turned in that direction, it is familiar and comfortable, but it is unproductive and it is NOT God's will for you! Turn back around and look, toward the light. Let the lurkers lurk, let the shadows fall where they may, you have business to attend to and it isn't back in those nasty shadows...it's right in front of you!!!
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