This is a tough one. Some people are more open to forgiveness than others. Sometimes it takes a long time. Some never forgive and harbor anger and resentment the rest of their days. They walk around, head down, bitter and beaten.
We all get to a point in our lives where we have been hurt by another person so bad, and our grief is so painful, even the most mundane tasks seem impossible. We try to process what has been done, only to come up empty. Thoughts twirl and swirl in our head, we feel lost and hopeless... then we get angry. Shoving the anger down and pretending it isn't there isn't a viable solution. It will surface eventually. Many times with no warning! Then it gets ugly.
As a vital part of the healing process, anger is a defense mechanism that provides us with energy and momentum for a while. The problem is that if we hang on to it too long, it turns on us like a rabid animal. Our anger doesn't hurt the people that we are angry at, it hurts us! Jesus is very clear about forgiveness of others. When asked about how many times we should forgive the same person, his reply was "Seventy times seven." Pretty sure that wasn't the answer Peter wanted to hear.
Forgiveness requires giving up control of the situation. We think we will be viewed as weak. However the opposite is true. It takes great strength to forgive the people who hurt us. As Jesus was hanging on the cross, He asked God to forgive the people who were mocking him. We need to remember that God forgives us for everything we ask, and we in turn must forgive others. Even the Lord's prayer that many of us recited daily as kids addresses this issue.
You can not heal and grow as a person until forgiveness is possible. Be patient and pray this simple prayer:
Lord, forgive me for my anger and hostility today. I am in pain because of the actions of someone else. Free me from my addiction to control of this situation. Allow me to forgive and move on. Remind me to stay focused on the present and not the past. Thank you for sending Jesus, so that we will all be forgiven. AMEN
Matthew 18:21-35
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